Let's Define That Shall We?

self-worth

noun

the sense of one's own value or worth as a person; self-esteem; self-respect.

Well this is an interesting thought. If our “self-worth” is determined by the sense of “one’s own value”… then why do we always make the assumption that how we feel is based on how someone else is treating us? Or not treating us… whatever the case may be there. It’s an entirely internal process. There isn’t blame to be placed on anyone else but ourselves. No one can make us feel whole or empty. If I could place the blame on anyone for how I’m feeling though I’d probably have to stick with the good old fashioned 'parent' suspect. Either one. I’m sure they did this. Or maybe it was that guy I dated in my early 20s... or teens. Or just a few years ago..

 

I have always had a really poor version of myself mapped out in my head. I was definitely not as pretty as my friends growing up. They were gorgeous. I constantly saw pretty girls being treated far better than myself. My brothers were pretty awful to me… but always very kind to the pretty friends I would bring around. (Now as a 33 year old adult I see that my brothers were just creepily flirting with my friends.. so of course they’re going to be nice to them). Really though most guys were nicer to my friends than they were to me. I was definitely the girl with too short of jeans, unbrushed hair, blue cream eyeshadow and mascara that always smudged under my eyes because I was probably using the same tube of Maybelline my mom used. I wasn’t a particularly girly girl. I really wanted to be.. but I didn’t know where to start. I was funny though! And had the personality. Which is just another word for “fat friend”. At least this is all how I saw myself.

 

I would say that now… I know that I am pretty. Very pretty in fact. My hair could be thicker, my tummy could be thinner, my lips fuller, my laugh less colicky, and my sense of humor a little cleaner. I could be more kind to strangers. I could smile with my whole face instead of just the ‘white person smile line’ that happens when I greet someone I don’t know. If I was to start a list at any point of things I like about myself you should know all of these things in this tiny paragraph are things I actually do find to be positive. I typically don’t apologize for who I am and the things I like about myself are rarely going to be found on lists for other people. So maybe I’m not super outwardly friendly to people I don’t know that well… I still try to fake it until I make it because I don’t like when other people feel poorly about themselves.. And maybe I sound like I’ve been smoking for 25 years when I laugh.. I laugh a lot because laughing is fun and feels amazing.

 

But these things aren’t Pretty.. I am a very cool person. Hilarious! Real liberal laugher. I have great friends and honestly I can make friends easier than most. I am down for pretty much anything at anytime (unless it’s cold.. and/or snowing.. or windy.. or I’m hungry and/or sleepy.. or hungover) But you get my drift. I wouldn’t call myself unique. I’m more of the same. I love llamas and mustaches. I basically bleed coffee and if I’m in the right mood I can drink a lot of people under the table and I just so happen to prefer cheap beer to anything else. Well except a nice IPA from Draught Works. Or like a really cold chocolate porter… I really want a beer right now. Anyway… I am a very creative thinker and it’s definitely not on display whenever I use the F word every other word in any given sentence. That’s happy or mad, folks. That’s basically just my vocabulary. I’m also really smart and I learn super quick.

 

But what makes me feel very stupid 90% of the time and that I have yet to learn at all is why I don’t seem to see any of these things as adding up to any amount of worth because physically I have a hard time finding myself attractive. I have a really hard time believing people genuinely want to be in my life and it’s not just out of obligation at this point. Why can I not picture myself in a happy and healthy relationship?  Why do I settle for the emotionally unavailable every time?

 

If I could focus on how I see myself and forget how I think the world sees me.. I am pretty much a solid 10. 9.5 before I’ve had coffee and brushed my hair. Maybe a 9 when I’m hungover. Definitely an 8.5 when I’m hungover AND didn’t get enough sleep.

 

I’m typically a hard 7 on Sundays though.

The point is... what will it take for Me to see Me. And not worry about how You see Me?.. When will I feel like I am enough.  

Sweet Dreams Aren't Made of This

I've always looked at my dreams like they are something. They mean something. They represent something.

Last nights dream though I am completely at a loss. Have you ever had a dream about someone you are fond of? Close to? Care about? I'm talking new friendships, new crushes, or just new people in your life.

I hardly have dreams where friendships are ugly. They are always perfectly perfect. We're getting along swimmingly and things are dreamy, if you will. If it's someone I have a crush on, it appears to be the perfect relationship. If it's a new OR old friend the friendship is like two superheroes working perfectly together. I've mentioned before my crazy dream friends that I have. People I don't know at all in real life but they are there in my dreams to help me solve whatever problem or to help me get through the ever present video game dreams I have all too often. You know, the ones where you know you're dreaming and so you actually start "playing" it like it's a video game? You know you have to get to point A to resolve something happening in point B.

Well last night... I had a dream about a friend of mine and it wasn't perfect. In fact they were crude and gross and mean. They were overly pushy and obnoxious. They were mean to my mom. They were just flat mean. They weren't this "perfect" person I've had in my mind's eyes. In fact, they were sloppy, tangled, and a down right hot mess. I know this person in real life isn't any of these things. In fact, I have found them to be considerate and kind. So I wonder if this dream was put in place to bring me back down to earth with all of this. I allow myself to float on clouds when it comes to people. I allow myself to get too wrapped up in their opinion of me. I bring myself into such a tornado of emotion because of how much emphasis I've placed on these people.

I think my dream brain was reminding my conscious brain to just hit the breaks. Stop analyzing friendships and relationships as if they are claim denials to solve at work. I over think and over analyze everything.

Take a breath, Tikalsky. Life works out the way it's supposed to and life is beyond funny sometimes.

And Cinderella, if dreams are a wish your heart makes... then my heart has seriously weird wishes!

Save Your Breath - I'll Catch Mine Eventually

Have I ever mentioned how much I hate to be warned about someone or something? I hate it. Why are you telling me all these things? What benefit to you is it to get that warning out there? You don't think I've had enough disappointment in my life that I can't handle a little bit more - if disappointment is even the end result? You don't think I can handle a let down? Or that I haven't been let down in the past? Yes, I am sick of disappointment. Yes, I hate being let down -- but You literally cannot shield another person from experiences.

Experiences. That's what life is. It's a combination of planned events, unplanned events, bullets to dodge, and dun dun dun.. experiences.

Every single decision we make during the day is ours to make. Do you remember in my last post when we discussed (I say "we" like you had any choice.. no I discussed) freewill. The ability to choose our own choices. Well I choose my Choice. I Choose My Choice. (Thanks, Charlotte York-Goldenblatt for this little quip). I choose to get wrapped up in something that may or may not work out because I have faith that things always will. Even though I know that disappointment and let down happens. I am well aware of these things.

I am well aware that my rose colored glasses I see everyone and everything through are often tainted by the goodness I believe exists in all people. I am well aware that this isn't a movie and this is real life and bad things happen to good and bad people and that karma is a bitch and that people can most definitely treat other people with vagrant ignorance. I get it. However, I don't choose to treat people this way. I don't purposely try to screw anyone over and hurt them, so I don't expect anyone to actually do that to me. Even though, it has definitely happened. No one warned me about those people. No. Where were the warnings with them? Nowhere. Do I even on some level wish someone would have been there to say "Now, Katie..." because that would have instantly taken away my ability to choose my own choice.

In closing: Unless you have evidence that someone is a serial killer rapist pedophile or can show me specific examples of where someone has specifically said "Cannot wait to screw ____ over" then mind your own business.

That's it: Mind ya bid'ness

Change of Plans

A couple of months ago I had plans for this weekend. Plans that would have determined a lot of different things about my life. If these plans were still in effect as they were a few months ago, the dinner I had with girls from work last night wouldn't have happened. There are other things and people that currently exist in my life that wouldn't exist had these plans not fallen through as well.

I say fallen through as if things just kind of didn't work out. Which they didn't, obviously, but not just circumstance... Anyway.

It's funny... this weekend could have been substantially different than the weekend I am living currently. So even though Thursday isn't technically the weekend it still counts as something that would have never happened. I got to finally see the city. The actual city. It was amazing. My tour guide was hilarious and took me to a lot of vastly different places. From one of the more ghetto areas to an extremely ritzy area. Through uptown and then through NoDa. NoDa is full of hipsters and I found myself strangely drawn to it! There is a lot more to see, I'm sure, and I'm looking forward to checking more of it out eventually.

And then Last night I laughed with girlfriends. I haven't laughed with girlfriends since I left Montana. We told stories and made jokes and just in general got to know each other outside of work. There was very little work talk and really we just talked about our lives and future plans and how we got to where we are today. It was awesome and I think I could really fall into wonderful friendships with these girls. Very happy with where I am in that regard. And then today I finally made it out to Kitty City in Concord. I fell in love with an unexpected little fella. He's white and grey and his name is Thor. I will be changing that name immediately to Kevin. Immediately.

I was going to go around town and do a few more things but upon leaving Kitty City I realized I was absolutely covered in cat hair and while I am not afraid of 'cat lady status', I cannot wear it like a badge of honor because honestly it just looks ridiculous. So I came home and all of these thoughts occurred to me so here I am writing them out for everyone back home to see. That really is the point of all of this. To keep everyone updated.

I'm eating and preying and loving this entire situation and had the plans that fell through not fallen through this weekend... I would be in a substantially different place in my life right now. I am so glad that whatever it was ended because something better has definitely pulled together in my life to show me how absolutely grateful I should be to be who I am.

I left behind all of my friends and all of my family to go on an adventure and while I am absolutely missing every single one of them right now, I assure you all that I couldn't be happier in this current situation.

Dream A Little Dream pt2

First of all, I dream constantly. When I was a little girl I would tell my dad (in great detail) about the dreams I had the night before. They've always been vivid, in color, full sound. I can control my dreams. If I recognize it's a dream, they turn into video games and I can actually make them go however I want. I have had repeat dreams more times than I can count and they are the best video game dreams because I can make them better than before. I fly a lot. Not a stand and take off fly though. I run really fast and I just take off. Like an airplane. I had a dream once where I was a bird. An actual bird. It was pretty interesting.

I've had dream friends since I could remember, too. I know they say everyone in our dreams are people we've actually seen in conscious life, but some of these people have been appearing in my dreams since I was a child. I don't know their names and I never get a clear face, but I know they are the same people. I don't know if I believe that dreams mean anything because I honestly think they are just our subconscious giving us pictures as to how we view the world. My world is sometimes terrifying, but most the time it's just a good time. (Life imitating dreams.. clearly)

Last night I had this dream where Bon Jovi (gross) was playing a concert in my mom's backyard. My brother and I decided we'd rather see Sublime so we headed up to the college to watch their show. When we got home Bon Jovi was still tearing down and I was exhausted and drunk. I asked them who they were and they all at the same time replied "Bon Jovi". I told them I'd never heard of them and asked what they sing. They listed a what's what of their greatest hits and I pretended like they must not be that big yet. I could feel the frustration at this point but I kept arguing anyways. At this point I realized it was a dream and with that I started telling them how terrible and cliche they were. I basically chewed out Bon Jovi and it felt like heaven.

I've had multiple dreams like this that have just stuck with me. One that I had in high school will never leave me. Everyone was up at the college in my hometown (I dream about this place a lot) and everyone was in line getting vaccinated for various things. I got sick of waiting and decided to walk home. Nearing the parking lot of the college I realize there is a guy in a jeep and he offers to give me a ride. I know this guy, but not that I can recall in real life have I ever actually met him. Dark hair, born eyes, great eyebrows. It's really snowy out and as we're driving I notice he's passed my mom's house. He flips around in front of the catholic church and heads back in the right direction. As he drops me off he writes his number on a piece of paper (pre-cellphone era) and it was 153-5166. I still don't know what this number means and I've never forgotten it. As soon as I woke up I wrote it down and it's just stayed with me.

Like I said before, I don't know if dreams mean anything or if they are just little plays our brain puts on for us as we sleep. Sleep would be really boring without dreams and I don't know how people who don't dream manage to sleep through the night.

The worst dreams are the ones where you wake up sobbing uncontrollably though... I'll save that for another post.

Friendship Date (A day late!)

Friendship day was yesterday (August 3rd). I missed it! Fortunately I talked to a few of my good friends back home. Life has actually kept on going since I left. I'm surprised you're all functioning so well without me. I know how hard it was for everyone to say goodbye to me. I was like the glue that held that little town together so I'm glad to see that I left a residue... :)

So today I was looking at various 'friendship quote' things on Pinterest. I was rather disappointed. None of them seemed at all to match up to what my personal friendships are like. They're all cheesy, over the top, lame, or old jokes. None of them accurately describe the various friendships I have had over the years. I have some ranging from 23+ years to 2 years. I value all of these friendships though because these people absolutely get me. They just do. They all understand this girl.

So since I was sorely disappointed in what Pinterest had available, I decided to write a few of my own friendship quotes. Ones that actually pertain to the varying friendships I have in my life.

"Sometimes I ignore your phone calls and tell you the next morning it was because I was sleeping. Really, I was watching Netflix and didn't want to be interrupted. But I still love you."

"When you do something stupid I will tell you that no one even noticed, but really everyone one did but I don't think you need to know that on top of the stupid thing you already just did."

"I often times think of all the stupid shit we did growing up and realize - we're children. And always will be."

"You make me a better person. Wait, you make me a drunker person -- That's more accurate."

"Sometimes all I want to do is call you and tell you about my day and not have to hear about your day because really I'm only calling to talk and not to listen."

And Lastly:

"I cannot imagine not loving you every single day that I have loved you since we very first met."

Truth be told: If you're my friend - You know it. There is never a question. I literally love my friends with my whole heart. Even when we hate each other because of a guy or because one of us was being flakey or because one of us was being completely annoying. Even when we say really terrible things to each other when we're drunk or ghost on the other while we're downtown.

My friends are irreplaceable.

Back to the Basics

Trying to think of things to write lately has been difficult. I have thoughts and opinions but I have become more worried lately about what people are going to think about my thoughts and opinions. I have recently stopped writing for myself and have started writing for whoever is reading. That's terrible and that's not at all how a real writer should be. I'm not going to impress everyone and I'm definitely not going to make or break relationships by keeping everything rated G or letting everything fluctuate into an R rating. I started this because I do have a voice and I do have my own shit going on. I'm on the adventure of a lifetime!

I've also found that I'm losing my writing style. I'm trying to compare myself to writers on other blogs and I'm finding that it's actually killing my own thought process. I don't need to use every $5 word in the book in order to get my point across. I like things black or white. I like not having a gray area. I like knowing and not being kept in the dark or lead on.. so why am I treating my potential readers the same way? I need to get back the point of this whole thing and that was to keep friends and family in touch with what it is I have been up to.

So let's get back to the basics by saying things have been happening lately and I believe them to be good things. I am trying to throw off my old habits by not actually putting all my eggs in one basket but luckily, because of my past experiences.. I have learned that slow and steady wins the race. So I'm going to actually just leave that as is because I don't know what else to say at this point. It could be good. I'm hoping it's good but won't be destroyed if it's not good. It's life.

I recently joined back up with the rest of the world and hooked up cable and internet. I have spent a total of 2 minutes watching TV (mostly to check and make sure I have AMC) and the rest of the time has been spent with my new boyfriend: Netflix. Well not new, we've actually been in a relationship for a lot of years. Back when DVDs and streaming came hand in hand. We took a break from each other but our relationship is still firm. That's what love is -- I think. Clearly, I'm an expert.

Today is going to be (well it's supposed to be) a productive day if I could peel myself away from the Roku and get in the damn shower. I have to pay rent, get an oil change, join the gym and clean my apartment.

Maybe it's not a full day, but Netflix and I have plans later.

The Best Parts About Growing Up With Older Brothers

Nothing.

A Life Alone is a Life Worth Living (A listicle)

This list is inspired by a friends' Facebook status today. She gave a brief 'pro and con' over living alone.

A week into it and I have a few of my own:

PRO I can literally talk to myself about anything and no one is going to say "Are you talking to me or yourself". It's nice to have these moments with myself. I understand me.

CON I pretty much have to talk to myself all the time because I'm a talker and when there is no one else around to talk to, I'll still continue to talk. I like an audience, but really... I need no audience.

PRO No judgement for any decision made within those walls. Seriously! I can eat dinner pantsless, in bed watching Sex in the City. Dinner can be as healthy as chicken tacos or as bad (but delicious) as Bojangles.

CON No judgement means I can pretty much fall into any and all bad habits without any qualms. Something I need to already check myself on.

PRO Sometimes, I can leave a cup in the sink over night and not feel like the world is going to end. Seriously, I can even leave my plate next to the sink for a little while and not feel a bit guilty about it.

CON There is literally no one but me to clean up after myself so, really, things get cleaned rather quickly. That could have a lot to do with the fact that I'm terrified of these bugs down here and I'm not interested in rooming with any of them.

PRO I don't have to share my new couch.. with anyone. It's pretty amazing really. Sprawl out for a nap and no one is gonna show up to interrupt you. You can also drink wine in the middle of afternoon on your couch without anyone passing judgment! An entire bottle of wine. In a water glass.

CON Opening a bottle of wine is hard. I need a boyfriend and/or a better bottle opener. Just to open it. Then they can leave whilst I drink the whole thing.

PRO After you drink a bottle of wine, it is completely okay to just get down on the floor and do some yoga. It may be considered counterproductive, but the relaxing quality of wine and the soothing quality of yoga combined all together is a really incredible feeling.

CON There are literally zero cons to doing yoga after drinking a bottle of wine.

NC to PA.. A Quick Weekend Trip

What a fast weekend that was!
I decided to drive (again). It was another experience though! I cannot live short of those. I drove up to PA to visit some friends and it was definitely needed! The drive... wow. I hit Virginia and then West Virginia. I made a surprise appearance in Maryland and then about the time I realized where I was, I entered into Pennsylvania. It was rainy and dark by the time I really got into PA and wasn't so impressed with the beginning of that leg of the drive. I was on some random windy road called Garret's Shortcut. Come to find out, a friend of mine in PA grew up there. So of course my drive home I took it all in. At night it's just a windy road, during the day it was something entirely different. It was extremely beautiful and peaceful farmland. It was full of old barns and silos. There were fields of farmland as green as I've ever seen them. The road was windy but I did manage to snap a few pictures.

Now, I realize I've only been here a week but seeing all those familiar faces was pretty incredible really. For the most part, I haven't seen any of them for over a year. It's always like no time has passed though. They are such a remarkable group of people. One of my best friends from high school moved over there right after graduation. And I don't know about her, but I am beyond glad that she did. She seriously fell into the greatest group of people I have ever met. The fact that me, her friend from high school, can also fall into place with them is really rare.

I just appreciate all the support from them and everyone back home. My heart literally hurts every time I have ever visited and then left Pennsylvania. I feel such pull from that state. It might just be a pull from the people, but I can tell that I belong there. Eventually. For some time. One day. Maybe for a year, maybe for 10. Definitely one day though, I'll live there. I always said I would. From the very first time to leaving there yesterday. I feel a weird connection to that town.

One thing at a time though. I'm still eating, preying and loving this area that I am in and this place in my life.

New Life!

I haven't updated this in a while because I literally have nothing to write about. I guess for now I can say that I absolutely love my new office. Everyone is very friendly and sweet. I am impressed with how many of them have popped over to say Hi or requested I find them so we can finally meet face to face. It was a nerve wracking first morning on Wednesday. I went to the wrong building first and then when I found the right building I was in the wrong parking lot! Oh well, I made it and it's been a ride.

Although I'm technically alone in this giant city, I have yet to feel actually alone. I don't have Wi-Fi or cable at the new place so I've been watching a lot of "Sex in the City" that I have on DVD. I also went ahead and bought "Seinfeld" and a season of "Friends". I go to the grocery store, cook dinner, do laundry. I FaceTime with family and text with friends. I snap as many pictures of this experience as possible.

I miss everyone back home so much, but not enough to give up. I am pushing forward in this new adventure and things are happening quickly. I head to Pennsylvania to see some friends tonight and then Monday I start a book club. (I have yet to finish the book.. I better get busy). That will give me a huge opportunity to meet some brand new people. I have to drive into Charlotte, which is terrifying, but I'm learning.

I'm learning that you do not drive the speed limit here. Like EVER. It's a mere suggestion. 10-15 miles over is what the actual speed limit is according to everyone here. On my 3rd day into the commute I am comfortable enough to put my music on blast and have a little concert in my car on the way to work. It's crazy how being in a place with 800,000 people has completely raised my self esteem. I feel like I could do absolutely anything!

Anyway, I am excited to get on the road tonight and I'm excited to head back to MT for Labor Day weekend. I'm just excited to do just about anything right now.

I'm just excited.

Realizations

10 years ago I graduated high school! I couldn’t wait to get out of the ‘hell hole, death trap’ town that everyone was STUCK in and going nowhere!

I couldn’t wait to run away from the 3 MIPs (minor in possessions).

I couldn’t wait to be independent from my parents. I couldn’t wait to get away from the same boring old routines that everyone falls into in this town.

I couldn’t wait to have real options for stuff to do! Anything was possible outside of this town. I couldn’t wait to be away from all the gossip and people talking shit. I really hated people knowing my business and knowing who I was.

I couldn’t wait to make real money and go out and party constantly and never worry about the cops busting it up.

I couldn’t wait to not be referred to as one of my siblings little sisters or have someone know exactly who my mom was.

I couldn’t wait to get away from the small town mentality and close mindedness that everyone in that town possesses.

I’m really glad I grew up.

Fast forward to now. I just graduated college! I cannot wait to leave Dillon but not because it’s a hell hole that I’m stuck in.

I haven’t been in a single bit of trouble since I was 18 and I value my independence above any other trait I possess. I have fallen into a wonderful routine here that I will never regret. I frequent the same bars, same restaurants and I hang out with the same people. And I love all of it!

There is a lot to do here. You just have to be willing to have a little bit of a creative mind and money for beer. There are a lot of possibilities in this town; however, even I know that working PR in this town would be difficult at best.

Not that I’m in the middle of the gossip, but I hear it and no one talks about me. And if they do, I honestly don’t know where their shit talking would come from. I absolutely love that people know me here now. I love it! They may not know me personally but I’ve met people that have ‘heard of me’ and it’s never been a bad thing.

I have literally not made ‘real money’ in my life. I make enough to get by for a single, kid-free person. I’m comfortable. Partying constantly gets old. Yeah, I said it. I love to drink, but I hate to feel it for 4 days afterwards.

I still cringe when someone says “Oh you’re so and so’s little sister!” I hate it. But I’m also secretly proud when these people also say “I love that guy” referring to either brother or “she’s so sweet!” referring to any of my step sisters and if you know my mom count yourself lucky. She’s absolutely amazing and I will fight you to the death over the fact that my mom IS better than your mom.

This town is small town and the people have their own opinions. The only thing that was close-minded was me. I had a complete inability to realize people are entitled to their own opinions...even if I don’t agree with them! It doesn’t make them ‘bad’ people. We just don’t have discussions related to that topic.

Growing up here wasn’t easy, but growing here made me who I am today.

A 2 Part Listicle (pt 1)

One of my favorite parts about the internet is the LISTS. A lot of people hate lists and a lot of writers hate lists. I am neither a person nor am I a writer because on a list of Things I Love:

1. Lists are number 1! I seriously love lists. Especially when lists are happy! A list of things someone loves is probably my favorite thing in the world. You can essentially learn a lot about people by their "list". Also, the more we talk about the things we love, the better off we are. I love you, lists. All of you. 

2. Owls. Long story short, I was being extremely grumpy one day and my weird ass middle brother showed me his impression of a burrowing owl. Which was so stupid and hilarious... I now equate owls with belly laughs. I often refer to them as 'owies' because I'm actually 12 years. My mom bought me some kitchen towels with owls on them. I refer to them as my "owie towies'. *Issues run deep with this one*

3. Really terrible music. It's no secret that I have a tendency to listen to shitty music. Not like universally shitty like Nickelback or Creed. No, it actually might be worse.. because on my current playlist I have such things as Miley Cyrus, One Direction and Selena Gomez. I like to think that the Aesop Rock, Atmosphere and Josh Martinez that are also included on the previously aforementioned playlist allows me some leeway from too much judgement, though. I'm 28 and I will still party like I'm 18 to some pop music.

4. Guys in Hats. Not to be mistaken with guys in cowboy hats, top hats or *shudder* fedoras. I mean ball caps. Not flat billed hats. Ball caps. Like the ones that show off their favorite sports team or store they frequent. Not that a nicely gelled or 'pasted' hair style isn't good with me, there is just something about a hat. Also under the hat is probably messy hair. And who doesn't love messy hair?

5. Orange Beers. Sometimes referred to as the 'beermosa'. I can't get enough of these things. They are refreshing on a hot day, soothing on a stressful day, and perfectly acceptable on a day that reaches 20 below zero. I take mine with Miller Light and OJ. Sometimes a Blue Moon or a Raspberry Wheat Shock Top. Mostly I'm happy with a Miller Light and OJ. I am literally drooling right now.

6. Well gin shots. Warm gin, straight up. Shot glass. Family. It's definitely a family tradition and it is just something we do.

7. Someecards. I have made so many of these things. Here, I'll share a few of my personal favorites that I have made. Feel free to share or save.

There are definitely a lot of things in this life that I love. I have been fortunate enough to find my happiness in these last 6 years and I'm grateful for all the amazing experiences that are to come. 

These are just 7 out of a million. Find your happy in the little things! That's the only advice I know I can give.