Online Dating Observations

Okay so, it's 2014. Most everyone that I know at this point has been on some version of dating site. I've tried a couple. Most recently, I decided to give it another shot because of this move across the country. I figured I could try and make some new friends in advance, however, I've come up short every single time. Maybe it's because I shouldn't be on a dating site to make friends... I am almost certain it's because I am actually the 'meet cute' kind of girl. We're not going to meet sitting on our respective computers, we're going to meet in a grocery store, bowling alley, bar.. somewhere adorable like that. But, it's slowly becoming a realization that I am not meeting any of the Rights online. (Not to discount people who have met their 'others' on dating sites. I know quite a few people actually that have been successful in this way. I'll call them the lucky ones.)

1. If I don't respond, I'm not interested. It's a lot like when someone doesn't respond to me. I can take a hint and move on. You're really not getting it when your "hey beaitufl" goes unanswered? Which takes me to my next point:

2. If there are a lot of lazy spelling errors in your messages, I won't respond. There is the occasional mistype and I get that. Sometimes you transpose letters or auto-correct isn't working to your advantage, but as in the case above, if those are the only two words you're sending me and 50% of it is an error? I'm probably not giving you the benefit of the doubt.

3. Why do you only have pictures of you with other females? If you are trying to attract a woman, any woman, then why are you only posting pictures of yourself with multiple other females? I totally understand you wanting to display how 'attractive' you are to the opposite sex, but if that were true why are you on a dating site? You have 50 friends that are all girls and zero male friends. To me that screams RUN!

4. When I say "I'm actually really independent".. that isn't a bad thing. And it also doesn't mean that "I'm only independent until you come into my life." I don't say these things to make you feel some type of way about me. I seriously mean that my independence is important to me and I can still maintain that even while in a relationship, so don't tell me I won't 'need' to be independent once I meet you.

5. I am looking for new friends is not an invite to proposition me for sex. It does not mean that I am looking for 'friends with benefits' on an online site. I don't think I have to explain this further.

6. No, even online, actually does mean no. This one should actually go along with #5, but I had to reiterate.

7. Please actually read my profile. It's always very obvious to me when guys don't take the time to even skim my profile. It's not even a long read. It's a couple of short sentences about how I am literally looking for friends, what my interests are, and what kind of person (I hope) I am. Asking me questions that can be answered by peeling open your eyes for like 2 seconds is not going to secure a response from me.

8. I don't want your phone number. Not right away, anyway. Mostly because I don't want to give you mine right away because the more that happens the more I risk having to eventually change my number. It's always so unnerving when your second message to me is your phone number. Why? So we can now continue this ever so promising 1 message long relationship via text message? No, please.

9. Not all online daters are shallow. You sent me an 'interested' sign, I checked out your profile. I didn't message you. You then message me and ask how dare I not message you back after you click 'interested'. I must be shallow or just cruel. Right? Or maybe I saw that you're old enough to be my dad, you have 'being awesome' listed as one of your hobbies and you have 5 kids.

10. Cheesy pickup lines online, too? We're all on this site for a common reason. To meet someone new. Whether that person is going to be a new friend, a new relationship or a new whatever. I don't need you to add insult to injury by using any form of pickup line to get me to speak to you. That includes also the cheesy one liner compliments. "Hey beautiful" "Hey cutie pie". I couldn't imagine myself ever sending a message to a random stranger and saying "Hello, handsome!" It just cheapens the whole experience for me.

I just do better meeting people and making friends in person. I have slowly brought myself to this conclusion.

I am going to keep trying and I haven't deleted my account...yet. Like I said before, I know people who have actually been successful in this way! I just don't know if it's the 'way' for me.